We got a late start this morning, as I’ve been battling mastitis this week and was feeling wiped out. Jamie just got over a throw-up bug, and the boys slept in until about 8:00 AM too. They never sleep in! LOL! Add to that Preston’s long and crazy temper tantrum over lotion early yesterday morning (before 6:30!), and I think we were all just wiped out.
So I laid there for a long time, listening to the sounds of the morning as Hazel dreamily nursed, and I was faced with some hard-hitting and uncomfortable truths. About my parenting, about my teaching, about my motivation (or lack thereof), about a myriad of personal subjects that *hurt*. It’s time for some growing up!
I am one that actually likes a good criticism. The spirit it’s shared in makes a HUGE difference, of course, but having your weaknesses exposed gives an opportunity to make yourself better than what you were. It’s not easy, and it’s certainly not fun! And while anger may be a first reaction, I end up *learning* from the ideas of others on what I’m doing wrong~it lends to reflection. I just wish that people would talk to me openly and honestly rather than harbor resentment and allow bitterness to take root. I am guilty too though, since I tiptoe around everyone like a little worm! LOL! It’s true that I want everybody to like me. WHY do I care? And SO MUCH?
That’s really all I have to share today. Except that there‘s more than one right way to do things. I know that some may seem lazy through the eyes of others, and it may be partially true! And yet we should understand the stages of life we are sitting in judgement of. Nursing a baby or toddler on demand takes a lot of time. Sometimes it does cut into the doing of other tasks, depending on teething or sickness or growth spurts… and I really need to stop now, as I‘m beginning to babble! LOL! Ah well. At least it all makes sense to me…. (((((HUGS))))) sandi
ETA that those without children don’t seem to realize that sometimes they cry. Sometimes they have tantrums. It can be over silly stuff too~that you wouldn’t let them in your shower, that you had to put them down to finish dinner, that they don’t wanna put their toys away or do their copywork. Or just that you had the gall to say, “No,” to any one of their present fancies. Sometimes they’re just LOUD! LOL! and we have lots of happy noise, too… Singing goofy songs while doing chores, laughing hysterically over the slightest little thing, ticklin’, wrasslin’, and sometimes I even mistake their FUN for wailin’….
I also wanted to add that while still reflecting, I see that this entire post is void of God. That it’s all about ME and my thinking process~not seeking and prayer and surrender….
I like good criticism too, about a day after I hear it. It takes me some time to truly process and analyze to see if there is truth or the other person’s perspective is missing a bigger piece of the puzzle.
And I like you very much.
amanda
All I have to offer is cyber hugs…but sometimes they are helpful.
None of us are perfect and that is where God comes in and the main thing is we try our best.
[those without children don’t seem to realize that sometimes they cry] Amen and amen… it would make me mad, except I used to be one of them. I was a way better parent before I had any kids.
I remember going out to eat after a late meeting with a coworker. It was late for dinner ~ probably about 8:30. There was a family at the restaurant with kids. I remember thinking, “It’s a school night. Why in the world would they have their kids out this late. They should be in bed.” Then, I dreamed about how awesome I was going to be when I was a mom.
Well, my first foster child moved in right before school started. On the third day of school, she hurt her finger playing tether ball. By the time she got home from school, her finger was purple, her hand was swollen and she was crying. I tried to splint it and ice it, but it was so swollen, I couldn’t tell if the bone and joint were aligned. We went to the Emergency Room. After she was x-rayed, splinted and given something for pain… realizing that it was way past dinner and I didn’t have anything defrosted… we went out to eat, at about 8:30, on a school night.
Hmmph! While I was waiting for my food I recalled the night I had all those self righteous thoughts. I had been a “mom” less than a month! I could hardly eat; I was too full from having eating my words ~
I can empathize completely. There are times when kids just need to run and laugh and sing and be loud. That is part of being a kid. My neighbors don’t seem to understand that.
Sorry about the sickness. I hope that your week gets a whole lot better.
It’s funny sometimes, even as parents, we can forget what it’s like to be a kid.
No one is the best parent in the world, but when your child tells you that they love you, or does the right thing, then you know you are the best parent for your kids.
Here is a hug for you Sandi (((HUG)))!